Rumour Overload and Newcastle United

Anyone with a Twitter account will be fully aware of the rumour WWE supremo Vince McMahon wants to buy Newcastle United.

At some point last night, a small US sports news website made claims that the head of WWE saw the Magpies as a way to advance the cause of his WWE brand in the UK market. While this is forgetting the fact WWE do UK arena tours (next one is booked for May) and the thing is shown on Sky Sports regularly, this is a rumour that gained significant traction and interest over the evening.

Before long, there was photoshopped team line-ups of WWE characters lining up in 4-3-3 formation, references to WWE referees, takedowns, steel chairs, rods and all manner of bizarre stuff. Most amusing were also bizarre hypotheses on how a take-over might work, incorporating the weird narrative arcs that has made WWE a huge entertainment product in America.

The problem is that its probably not going to happen. It was rumoured in summer 2011, although dismissed at the time as nonsense, while latest reports indicate Mike Ashley values Newcastle at £330M.

Valuations are always oddly totted up in football. Liverpool cost their owners Fenway Sports Group £300million in 2010, while Fulham were a £200million purchase last summer for Shahid Khan. The recent attempts to value the clubs by a leading sports accountant back in April last year valued Liverpool as a more valuable asset and Fulham as a significantly less expensive one.

The same study had Newcastle valued at £275M - the 7th most valuable club in England, after both Manchester clubs, Arsenal, Chelsea, Spurs and Liverpool.

In an ordinarily world, there should be punters beating a stick to the St. James' Park door. The club is a valuable brand with a very loyal fanbase and potential for riches in a league that is an orgy of cash greater than any rap video. Couple this with an owner that hasn't seen a game since September, does not seem especially keen on engaging his investment aside from bare minimum loans to help out and is reportedly interested in selling, and it should lead to some interest.

But this interest has not been coming, although not for the want of reporting. Since Ashley first put the club up for sale in September 2008, there have been 13 groups linked with taking over. Some, like local businessman Barry Moat, were closer to happening than others, but ultimately none happened and Ashley has remained in charge at St. James' Park.

The lack of communication between the Magpies board - Ashley or otherwise - and the outside world has led to the blossoming of all manner of rumours alongside that of takeovers.

While takeover rumours are one thing, the manner of all other hypothetical scenarios about the club's current situation have been allowed to stem by a lack of communication from the board apart from standard things, and a lack of belief in the words of manager Alan Pardew.

Among recent rumours include the questions over what, if anything, the role was of Director of Football Joe Kinnear, who was dismissed from his role two days after the Tyne-Wear Derby and three days after the club failed to land a replacement for Yohan Cabaye.

The main idea that has been doing the rounds is the idea that the man once christened JFK by the club's fans was hired to be a patsy to deflect hate away from Ashley and Pardew.

While it is likely, it was also not helped when Pardew himself said he was happy with the work Kinnear did. Its big talk for a man to say he is happy with the work done when his squad is significantly weaker than it should be, given Kinnear is the man who only bought in two loan players and sold Cabaye and the equally useful James Perch without replacements.

Its arguable Kinnear might still be around had the club concluded a deal for Lyon's Clement Grenier, Montpellier's Remy Cabella or one of our other targets by the end of the window. But all managed was a loan move for Borussia Monchengladbach forward Luuk de Jong, who has yet to convince.

Other recent rumours have included the idea the club does not want to be in European competitions, or at least skip the Europa League and go straight into the Champions League. Pardew has previously said it had a huge impact on the club's 2012-13 campaign, and said the quick turnaround teams are expected to perform was not ideal to his team's progression.

This is not a view confined to the men from NE1 - Southampton manager Mauricio Pochettino has said he is not interested in reaching the Europa League, and that it should be abolished, while Spurs, Swansea and Wigan have all fired their managers after slow starts hindered by European competition.

It wasn't always this way. Back in 2003-04, Newcastle managed 5th and a UEFA Cup semi-final with very little rotation and genuine misery we couldn't reach the final. Its possible, however, that as players are now expected to cover significantly more miles in games than they were a decade ago, it means its not practical to maintain this full-throttle pace continually.

But at the same time, it feels a little bit gutting that we didn't push on and go "Well, we're here - why not go for it?"

The conspiracy on short-term funding and a lack of interest in Cups due to a perceived lack of investment is also a common one. But this conspiracy is more grounded in reality.

At the club's fans forum meeting at the start of the season, board members said the cup competitions do not represent a priority for them. This is in line with a lack of money put in by Ashley, with the club expected to be self-sufficient on a £20M-a-season investment plus whatever TV, matchday, commercial and transfer income turns up.

The start of the 2012-13 season saw the club expected to push on with just one player bought in to try and help the club's progression. This ultimately proved short-sighted, and left the club struggling for numbers until a belated January splurge.

Existing on what we earn would be easier if it wasn't for the fact that, as financial figures showed, the club's matchday and commercial income has halved since Ashley turned up in 2007. It would be easier if we had this shortfall - a fair bit of which would be made up by the millions of free advertising SportsDirect and associated brands have been receiving on the club's billboards.

Its commercial income is not helped by the reported monetary that the club earns less from its sponsorship deal with Wonga.com then it had done with its existing deal from Virgin Money, although as no official disclosure has been coming, it allows for the continuation of rumour.

One further conspiracy theory, as outlined in club fanzine The Mag, is that Alan Pardew's 8-year deal is part of the club's attempt to find new owners, with Ashley deciding a new owner can back him or sack him so Pardew can keep the club ticking over in the Premier League until his departure, and someone else can decide what to do with him.

As noted by the Daily Mirror's North-East correspondent, the ambivalence of Ashley has been the main thing keeping Pardew in employment at St. James' Park at a time when the club appear to be coasting to the finish line. A more trigger-happy owner would have most likely opted to change by now.

Conjecture and misinformation is rampant around the club. The lack of communication and disclosure coupled to an information-hungry and dissatisfied fanbase has allowed weird theorems to run rampant.

Last night saw this taken to its extreme, with the WWE takeover rumour despite the likelihood that the only time (if ever) Tynesiders will see Vince McMahon in the city will be when the WWE people arrive at Newcastle Arena for a show in May.

The lack of information even seems to have impacted on journalists. The Sunday Express has been banned from St. James' Park after the club essentially described a story on Pardew being reportedly one game from the sack as made up.

But with no information on what the truth is, this means the rumour mill has been allowed to run wild, spouting all sorts of crackpot theories that may or may not have resemblance to reality at NE1. As well, it means the aura of the club is shrouded in mystery, and just seems that nobody in any capacity has any knowledge of what is going on.

The sooner truth happens one way or another is probably best for all concerned with the Newcastle United fans, commentators and possibly the management, employees and playing squad as well.